NOBEL TRADER

Book Home Books Information Abraham Simpson

Abraham Simpson Simpson - An animated hero

Abraham J. Simpson ("Grampa" or "Abe") is a fictional character featured in the animated cartoon television series The Simpsons. His voice is provided by voice actor Dan Castellaneta.

Family

Abraham Simpson is estranged husband to Mona Simpson, father to Homer Jay Simpson and Herbert Powell, father-in-law to Marjorie Bouvier Simpson and grandfather to siblings Bartholomew J. Simpson, Lisa Marie Simpson and Margaret Simpson. He also fathered a daughter named Abbie by a British lady named Edwina while in England during World War II. He was briefly married to Amber, the woman Homer married while in Vegas. Also in The Simpsons Uncensored Family Album, the family tree shows his parents' names to be Orville Simpson and Yuma Hickman.

Abraham Simpson's name derives from Matt Groening's real-life grandfather's first name. However, the writers of The Simpsons were the ones that chose the name, not Groening. Also, one of Matt Groening's sons is named Abraham.

His name as "Grampa" seems to be obscure and mysterious. Originally, the name seems to have come from the fact that he was Bart, Lisa, and Maggie's grandfather. However, his Junior Buckaroo Badge contains the name "Little Grampa Simpson". This would be impossible, since it is thought that he obtained his badge during his childhood, long before he even had sons.

Romantic life

He was married for a number of years to Mona, who left him after becoming entranced with the hippie lifestyle and going on the lam while Homer was very young. She came back three decades later, but Abe's bids to woo her and win her back were met with ambivalence at best.

Before his marriage, during WW2, he had an affair with a woman in England named Edwina, producing an illegitimate daughter, Abbie, whom he did not meet until she was grown.

He once even got as far as dating the oldest woman ever, with her age at 120 years old. But the short-lived romance fell quickly after she spent most of her time with the Guinness crowd. He wore a 13 pound beard of bees for her but it was not enough to win back her heart.

Another affair, with a nameless prostitute he met at a carnival, produced Herbert Powell. Herb was adopted by Edward Powell and Mililani Osler and worked his way up from poverty to found a successful automotive design business. Believing himself to be dying, Abe confessed his infidelity to Homer, sending him on a quest to find his half-brother.

In his golden years Abe dated Bea Simmons, a fellow resident of his retirement home. Bea passed away and left Abe a little over a hundred grand in her will. After some soul-searching Abe later used his newfound wealth to refurbish the falling-down Springfield Retirement Castle, including a fancy new memorial dining hall in Bea's name.

He briefly dated another fellow golden-ager, but her head was turned by a slick elderly gentleman at the home with a spiffy car. Abe realized, following an ill-fated jaunt to Branson, Missouri that she was a "hoochie" and totally wrong for him.

He also, for the span of one episode, dated his daughter-in-law's mother, Jacqueline Bouvier. She later started dating Charles Montgomery Burns and almost married him, though the marriage was stopped by Abe.

Personality

Grampa Simpson is an ancient, grizzled, periodically incontinent, and mostly senile figure who lives in the Springfield Retirement Castle, a sad, lonely place filled with demented, crippled, and depressed old people (a sign near the entrance says "Thank you for not discussing the outside world").

His rambling stories trail away in forgetfulness and despair:

"You see, back in those days, rich men would ride around in zeppelins, dropping coins on people, and one day I seen J. D. Rockefeller flying by. So I run out of the house with a big washtub and... hey! Where are you going?"
"Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah. I used my washtub that morning to clean my turkey, which back then was called a 'walking bird'. We had walking bird on Thanksgiving with cranberry sauce, potatoes, and stuffing full of gun powder. We also sat around and watched football, which back then was called baseball."
"Long story short...is an expression whose meaning is long and rambling"
A recurring feature is Abe's constant explanation of what happened "in those days":

"We can’t bust heads like we used to, but we have our ways. One trick is to tell 'em stories that don’t go anywhere -- like the time I caught the ferry over to Shelbyville. I needed a new heel for my shoe, so, I decided to go to Morganville, which is what they called Shelbyville in those days. So I tied an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time. Now, to take the ferry cost a nickel, and in those days, nickels had pictures of bumblebees on 'em. 'Give me five bees for a quarter,' you’d say.
"Now where were we? Oh yeah -- the important thing was that I had an onion on my belt, which was the style at the time. They didn’t have white onions because of the war. The only thing you could get was those big yellow ones..."
Bart and Lisa dread his occasional childminding sessions; even a phone call has its dangers (" ... and that's everything which happened in my life right up to the time I got this phone call...") -- at least until he falls asleep and leaves them to their own devices. In the meantime, he fills his time with complaining about anything and everything to anyone and everyone he can find.